You Want to Publish What???

I am still frantically seeking to have one of my novels published after completing it on-just a second, let me check my records-10 March 2005, and the only response received by the masses of agencies out there "Seeking New Clients" appears to be a clone of the one before it-Don't call us, we'll-well never mind, just don't call us. Maybe they are only looking to publish writers that can guarantee them a 7 figure sale, like the college grad seeking employment where they say you must have a degree and 2 years experience. We will represent your book, but you have to have already sold at least 1 book which marketed over 10,000 sales. I really got frustrated one day at all the red tape, the false excuses, the let downs, etc., and replied to an agent asking them just WTF they wanted from a writer. I asked how come the same shit comes back every time in a response about how they don't have time to read every proposal, how they receive so many manuscript synopsis letters per month that they have to be selective yet none have even requested to see a manuscript.
The agent was super professional and answered me as if I were a child being scolded for something I had done wrong and actually explained to me in detail what I already knew, but wasn't ready to accept. That was the most truthful response I have received from any agent since taking the first step towards publishing and it was a wake up call for me. I admitted my probable faults, purchased several "How to Publish" type reference books, re-wrote my synopsis and proposal letter exactly how they suggested and nothing has changed. I need suggestions.
Is this like trying to get employment with the state? Do you have to wait until a published author dies before the agent needs another slot to be filled for you to become a selectee? Is this a lottery where agents must be bought as a ticket and hope for the best? Does anyone have any legitimate feedback for what is necessary to get a few words placed into print without mortgaging the house and giving up the kids? I am so confused...............